by Christine Brown-Quinn

It’s amazing how times change.  In my mother's time it wasn't usual for ‘nice’ married women to work at all, and certainly not seen as right for them to return to work after having a baby.

Then came feminism, and suddenly it seemed that going back to work was the only thing that a woman should do - anything else was a betrayal of womankind.

Now it seems to me that the tide has turned the other way again.  Although  there are still arguments for both sides and a bit of a battle going on, the media seem mostly in favour of those women who are choosing to prioritise family over their careers.  Suddenly, if you believe the media, it seems that any mum who chooses to go back to work is at risk of harming her child and is acting against the child's best interests.

Never mind if you have worked long and hard and carved out a fantastic career in a field that you love and that makes you feel complete as a woman.  Never mind if the lifestyle that you and your partner enjoy relies on two salaries - or if you are on your own and need to work to make ends meet. Never mind if childcare drives you batty and you feel that you need to have something else in order to exercise your mind - if any of these things apply to you, you are still in danger of being labelled a bad parent, plus of course, you will never manage to juggle it all.

Step Aside Superwoman is highly recommended for those women who, whether by choice or by necessity, have decided to buck the trend and return to their career or another job after having children.  It provides a refreshing insight from someone who has been there, done that, as to how this situation can work, and actually benefit all members of the family, including the children.

This book is brutally honest in parts - this is not some easy-to-follow  "10 steps to find your perfect work-life balance".  We all know that most of these books don't actually work. Instead Christine Brown-Quinn is straight-talking and honest and hits you with some home truths right from the start.

• You have to define the balance that works for you and your family - it won’t necessarily be the case as what someone else has got
  
  
• It is going to be hard - get used to it
  
  
• There are not enough hours in the day, so stop beating yourself up about it
  
  
• Just when you think you have found the balance, something will shift and you are back to square one again - its a constant ongoing process.

Some of this makes for slightly uncomfortable reading, but I think it is good in the long run to confront exactly what you are up against - then you can prepare yourself properly, move on and make a solution for yourself.  Once you accept the tough talk, and the need for an assertive can-do attitude, the book offers a lot of practical solutions for exactly how you can make things work.  There are tips for dealing with the children, with spouses, with carers, with employers and with those who question what you are doing.

There are plenty of practical solutions in here, a lot of moral support, and a hefty dose of realism and humour. Taken as a package, this provides real support, for any mum who has decided to swim against the tide of popular opinion and return to work. The book provides hope that with a little bit of planning and a lot of support, every mum can first define and then create, her version of a balanced life.

Christine Brown-Quinn has raised three children (the oldest now in their early twenties) whilst enjoying an international finance career, so she is definitely well-placed to comment on this subject. Christine founded the Female Capitalist in 2010, a consultancy service that helps professional women to achieve balance between career and family. This book has grown from her own experience and that which she has gained from helping others.

Step Aside Superwoman is available in paperback and Kindle editions in the Motivating Mum bookstore